When Stressed - I Bake

The wait is killing me, it will probably do me in before the cancer gets me. A little over
exaggeration really, but that's me. For someone who is always positive I am downright morbid these days.

I lie awake at night and think. Every since they poked my lung with a needle for the biopsy, I have visions of little cancer cells escaping from the tumor and roaming around inside my body causing more havoc. Scary shit really... It's the waiting...

Meanwhile, I sleep and bake...and play mindless games...

Cancer - The Saga Continues

Staging cancer....who knew.

 All I do now is go for tests with more to come. Yesterday morning I had a bone scan which required arriving early morning to be injected with radioactive die and returning two hours later for the scan.
Meanwhile I had a message that I would see the surgeon August 8th!!! Not good enough for me. When I was done with the scan we wandered over to his office, which happens to be on the same floor. Accidentally he just happened to be standing there and I reminded him that when I spent a night in hospital last week, he was the attending doctor and had said he could see me this week. I was prepared to beg his secretary if needed.

He said it was my lucky day, and yes he saw me. He arranged the next three tests for me, a PET scan, a brain scan and a special blood test to be certain there wasn't latent TB. That TB blood test turned out to be a bit of a cock up. It's only done at two labs in the entire city of Toronto and the original doctor, the Respirologist, who I swear has it in for me, gave me the wrong form. We had driven half way across town, paid a fortune for parking and they weren't going to do this test without a proper requisition instead of the letter given to me. Thank god for cellphones, I called the office and asked them to fax the requisition through to the lab. Poor Mr. was so frustrated but I wasn't giving up. The long and short is I got the blood work done.

The next test on the agenda is a PET scan and then a brain CT scan. Hopefully I won't have to wait too long. The Doctor  reassured us that if all worked out the way he thought it would, he'd have me in his OR end of August or early September. I feel a little less stressed today but I will feel a whole lot better if all the tests come back clean...ciao

I'm Out Of Practice

This poor blog was dormant for such a long time that someone somehow hacked into it and managed to delete all my photos from every post ever written. That is sad. I could spend day, weeks even trying to recreate every photo I ever posted. Meanwhile all photos are available by clicking on the Flickr badge on the side bar.

I'm not sure I'm up to it quite frankly, but I will try, two posts a day going back eleven years. I'm not sure where to even look for all those photos.

Tomorrow is another test, a PET scan this time. This is to see if and where the cancer has spread to. I am hoping it hasn't because then surgery would  not be an option any more. I don't know what comes next, I haven't been told. This happens one day at a time....ciao

Cancer - The Insiduous Disaese

My favorite expression is, I will live until I die. Well now's my chance to prove it and all I will say is this, I will live. I will fight this with everything science has to throw at me and will come out at the other end triumphant.

The diagnoses happened in a weird way and in a very early stage I'm told. Being a sufferer of Rheumatoid Arthritis and Inflammatory Bowel disease for a number of years, most drugs have stopped working. The last and best chance was one of the new biologic drugs, Humira specifically.

The first step to approval was passing a TB skin test. I failed it in spectacular fashion when my arm blew up in a big red splotch. No one was too worried at that point as I'd had the BCG vaccine as a child specifically to prevent TB. The next step was a chest x-ray and my Mr. also had to be tested.
He also failed. Chest x-rays were next and masks for both of us. My chest x-ray showed a shadow, his was clear. I was put under quarantine.
 
Within three days, unheard of in this country, I saw a Respirologist and had a CT scan. These test were still inconclusive but I was warned that it could be TB, Cancer or something completely harmless called Necrobiotic Nodule, which is common for people who have IBD. The next two tests where a bronchoscopy and an lung needle biopsy, which hurt like hell. After the lung biopsy, my lung collapsed and I spent a night in hospital with breathing problems. I was also lucky to have met two wonderful thoracic surgeons, one young and absolutely gorgeous and the other a little older with an amazing bedside manner.  He didn't have the lab results yet but said the marble sized lump looked suspicious. Most positively though he said that if it was cancer, and if it hadn't  spread, he could cure me.

Three days ago it was confirmed, it is cancer. On Tuesday I have a PET scan to see if it has spread anywhere else. If it has then surgery is off the table. If it hasn't then I have a chance.

So here's hoping...ciao