6 Month Anniversary - A Sad One

On May 12th of this year my Mom passed away.



I miss her daily and terribly. She was an integral part of our daily lives since she moved in with us three years before. This is one of my favourite photos of her and was taken on my birthday the March before her death.

Mom and Dad emigrated to Canada in 1956 at the behest of her sister. It was probably the biggest mistake of their lives. Had they stayed in Germany their lives would have been much better and much easier. They left because my grandmother made my mother's life hell and no one knew at that time that my grandmother was in the early stages of dementia. Because my Mom was not from Wiesbaden but had come from the Baltics to marry my dad, she was a natural target. The fact that we lived in one room in their house didn't make it any easier.

Little did my parents know that Canada would be worse, much much worse. Both my parents had respectable careers in Germany, my father a railway track engineer and my mother a bookbinder, both lost professions now, but in those days well paying and respected, in Germany at any rate. Here in Canada they were reduced to washing floors in factories and cleaning other peoples houses. Neither of them complained though and did what they could to put food on the table and a roof over our heads. Any hope of better employments was quickly dispelled by signs like "foreigners need not apply".

Any hope of having more children were lost in the daily struggle for survival and that's why I am an only child and why I was so close to both my parents. We were it, it was us against the world. When I left my first husband with a three year old in tow, it was my parents who sheltered me and my mother in particular who protected me from further abuse. Taking care of her in her later years was something I could do to repay her for her earlier care.

I know parents are supposed to do these things for their children, but the fact is not all of them do. I was lucky and I was doubly lucky to spend the last few years of her life with her.

Tomorrow will be a sad day for me and I will lay my flowers at her grave and try not to cry too much.

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